Easter Egg NON-Hunt

Yesterday one of my kids came home with her bag of plastic eggs from her Easter party at school. As we're sitting at the kitchen table removing the candy from inside each egg, I notice something.
"Hey, why do all your eggs have the number 19 on them?"
The quick response was "Everyone had a number and you could only find eggs of that number."
"So everyone had a number that only they could find?"
"Yes."
At which point I snapped my mouth shut and seethed quietly to myself. Every kid gets a number which means every kid finds the same amount of eggs. No running around searching for as many as you can as fast as you can. Because that means some kids will get less than others. Egg hunts can't be games anymore because there are always winners and losers in games. And we can't have anyone getting upset if they lose. There are no losers.

This idea was brought to you by the people who took competition out of sporting events, marathon runs, field day at school, etc. Everyone gets a ribbon/trophy/medal! Everyone's a winner! 
So, if you aren't good at sports, it doesn't matter, you still win! You can actually just give up halfway through and that's okay because you'll still get your prize! You can tell your coach off, flip the other team the bird and sit on the bench but as long as you are wearing that jersey, you get a trophy!

We're all about preparing our kids for the real world these days. In the real world, you can make perfect grades in school as long as you just show up. People shouldn't get better grades than others because they worked harder, no, that might upset someone. 
You can get into any college you want because those grades didn't matter anyway, you applied just like the next guy so you should get in! 
You have no skills for a certain job but you want it anyway? Go apply, you'll get it! They won't risk upsetting you by telling you no.
Looking forward to that promotion/raise at your job? Just do the same amount of work as everyone else and you're sure to get it! Heck, do less, you'll still be a winner!

Everyone is a winner in life. You don't have to work hard to earn your prize. Just show up. Actually, if you don't want to show up, that's okay, we'll mail your ribbon to you.
We wouldn't want you getting upset.